Father Time is a jerk. He causes wrinkles and pains.
He even messes with your orgasms, according to Dr. Darius Paduch, Ph.D., an associate professor of urology and reproductive medicine at Weill Cornell Medicine.
Heres a look into how aging affects the Big O, and the best ways to keep your pleasure at its pinnacle for decades to come.
(And dont forget about her pleasure. Check out How to Pleasure a Woman for your ultimate guide to giving her the best sex ever.)
1. You Have More Distractions
When you had sex in college, you were 100 percent focused on the hot coed in your bed.
But maintaining that kind of focus is tougher in middle age when youve got extra distractions like your job, family, and kids, Paduch said.
Your brain plays a critical role in your journey to orgasm. To reach climax, youll need to activate several brain regions, Paduch said, but thats hard to accomplish if your mind is elsewhere.
When patients tell Paduch they dont feel orgasms as strongly as they used to, he first tries to determine whether theyre just preoccupied.
The perception of orgasm and the quality of orgasm can be affected by our environment, he said.
To get out of your head, give your partner a massageand ask her to return the favor, suggested Lisa Dawn Hamilton, Ph.D., an associate psychology professor at Canadas Mount Allison University.
Focus on the sensations you feel as youre touched and being touched.
Massage helps to relax you, but also shifts your focus to your bodyand hopefully away from the worries of your day, Hamilton said.
Related: 52 Ways to Chase Stress Away
2. You Never Snuggle
When you first met your partner, you couldnt keep your hands off of her. But the longer youre with your wife or girlfriend, the more comfortable you are around her.
That probably means less hugging and kissing on a daily basis. Basically, the honeymoon isnt just over its been over for years.
And thats bad news for your orgasms: In a study in Archives of Sexual Behavior, older guys who sometimes, rarely, or never engaged in sexual touching were 2.4 times more likely to have trouble reaching orgasm then men who always hugged, kissed, and caressed their partners while getting busy.
These forms of touching increases your sense of intimacy and help reduce your inhibitions, the research suggests.
3. Your T May Be Low
Testosterone is a huge modifier of your sensation of orgasm, Paduch said. But the older you get, the more your levels fall, according to a study in Andrology.
A drop in T can reduce your sex drive. Research from the European Male Aging study suggests that low testosterone can lead to a decrease in sexual thoughts, fewer morning erections, and more erectile dysfunction.
And as your testosterone disappears, so does your semen.
Around age 45, men start shooting 1.48 percent less per year on average, according to research in Fertility and Sterility.
Other age-related changes in cells that influence sperm production may also play a role, the researchers say.
Ejaculation volume can affect orgasm function in some men, Paduch said.
Although its possible to have an O without ejaculating, squirting adds to the sensation. Your prostatic urethra distends to push out fluid, which feels pleasurable.
Keep your T levels high with these 5 Easy Ways to Increase Your Manpower.
4. You Have a Dad Bod
Packing extra pounds? Guys who are obese convert a lot of their testosterone to estradiol, a form of the female hormone estrogen, Paduch said.
Thats not great for your arousal. A recent study in the Asian Journal of Andrology found that excess estradiol inhibits erections, possibly because it hinders relaxation of the smooth muscles in your penis.
Research from Rutgers University also suggests that obese people are less sexually satisfied, citing negative body image as one potential reason.
For a diet thatll help you shrink your gut fast, try our Lose Your Spare Tire! program. Its the easiest and most effective way to drop 20, 30, or even 50 pounds.
Bonus: Exercise produces endorphins, which can aid arousal.
5. You Have Other Health Issues
Orgasm troubles can often indicate problems elsewhere.
Out of the men I see with abrupt changes in sexual functioneither decreased sensation of orgasm or decreased sensitivity in the penisIll diagnose one third with diabetes, Paduch said.
Diabetes can damage nerves, reducing your ability to feel the friction of sex.
You could also be experiencing a decline in dopamine, a powerful brain chemical that plays a key role in orgasm sensations.
Older guys are more likely to have diseases like Parkinsons, which are linked to decreases in dopamine.
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