‘Every Day For Three Years I Chose Her A Little Less’: 21 People Confess The Reality Behind Their Breakup


I did want to be with this one. I really wanted to choose her. She was an exquisite woman, brilliant and funny and sexy. She could make my whole body laugh with her quick, sarcastic comments and my heart beat fast just looking at her turn over in bed. I loved her like crazy. Our young love created a whirlwind that clouded everything. We were happy. We genuinely were. Then cloud 9 brought us back to earth. I chose her less and less. Every day, for three years, I chose her a little less. I stayed with her. I just stopped choosing her. We both suffered for it. Choosing her would have meant focusing every day on the gifts she was bringing into my life that I could be grateful for: her laughter, beauty, spirit, playfulness, compassion, love, companionship, and so much more.”

We met during the last few months of school, I was dating my ex of 7 months. We became best friends & eventually me & my ex broke up. So we stayed friends for about 2 months and then we started talking. He treated me like I was the only girl in the whole world, even before we started dating. Then he asked me out in the absolute cutest way possible. Everything sad perfect, till one day we got into an argument & I told him I needed a break& he didn't fight for me.. Then when I tried to get him back he didn't want me anymore.. Then a while went by that we didn't talk & then we were on again, off again & now to this moment he refuses to talk to me because he thinks I do drugs, and illegal things (his dad's a cop) but he still lives down the street from me trying to make me jealous of his new girlfriend that will only last about 2 months like every other girlfriend he's had since me

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 10, 2016 at 6:44pm PST

We met as toddlers and grew up in the same church. I didn't pay any attention to him, but he watched me every Wednesday night. We became best friends in high school. I was infatuated with him! We talked all the time and he was my everything. We helped each other through relationships, but always came back to wanting each other. We didn't start dating until my senior year in high school, his junior year. He followed me to school and we were so happy. We got engaged just short of 4 years. Three months went by of planning the wedding. The week we planned our honeymoon, he came home and told me he didn't love me anymore and that he should have never proposed. What he meant to say was that he was sleeping with someone else and stole a couple thousand dollars of mine and didn't need anything else from me. It's been over two years and I still don't know what I did to deserve that horror. Some days I wish I knew where he was, but I know it's better for me that I have no idea.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 9, 2016 at 7:07pm PST

Hey guys I'm so heart broken. So my girlfriend and I originally met in eighth grade. We lived in the same apartment complex and she was friends with my sister. She was and still is the most beautiful girl I've ever layed eyes on. Every time I was around her my heart would pump all weird and I would act like a dork(even though I'm like super cool) lol you get the picture. She used to HATE me like boy even speak to me. So as high school came she still felt the same. My junior I transferred schools and one day during prom season she asked me to go with her. I Swear to you this was the happiest day of my life and from there we were just a perfect match. It was such a stunning relationship The morning I used to wake up every morning and just thank God that I have. Well when he came to college, I signed to Marshall University to play football and she went to a school in Iowa to run track but before we left each other we decided that we would not let the distance get to us. We made it through the first semester with ups and downs but we made it. When the Spring semester came things started to change a little and she started to drift away. I will try my hardest to call her but she would be too busy with work and track. Then one night I got a text message saying that she just doesn't feel the same anymore toward me and it might be the hardest thing that I have dealt with but she changed my life so much that I just think God that I had her for the time I did.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 10, 2016 at 2:04pm PST

Andrew was friends with a girl I was close with because they went to summer camp together. I gushed to her how cute he was. Days later, I got a DM from him saying "Hey." He had gone home from staying with his dad in the summer to his home with his mom in Mexico, but we started to talk regardless. We became fast friends and there wasn't a moment in those first few days that I stopped smiling or texting him. The first time we facetimed, we thought we had been talking for an hour and a half. After checking the time, we realized it was four hours of non-stop laughter and talking! Then, he told me this after discovering that I had been through a tough heartbreak from my first love: "you'll find someone, I promise,because you deserve someone special who will tell you everyday you're special because you're you. Someone who will call you beautiful every moment he can, because you're you. And most of all, someone who treats you like the incredible person you are, because you deserve it. Every girl does. And don't worry about him, he's an idiot who lost the opportunity that some people would die for. I know that personally." I fell madly in love. We started dating, and got serious fast. We faced a lot of challenges besides long distance because we both have mental illness, his much more severe than mine. Still, he saved up all of his money for a plane ticket to come for my birthday, and spent the rest on birthday gifts for me. He gave me both of his hoodie and my first kiss. He was the perfect match and loved my goofiness. After he left, we started to get a little distant. He was supposed to come in October, and the day of his flight had to cancel. I was upset, but I put my feelings aside. Soon, one night I discovered the truth. Andrew had been apathetic for a while, and never loved me or anyone. He only did all of it to make me feel the happiness he could never feel. I spent the whole night sobbing, and four months heartbroken and mad, but I am almost over him. We remain friends, and I've realized that he did all of that just to make me complete, selflessly. Andrew, if you ever read this, thank you. I forgive you. You made me feel loved for the first time in my life.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 5, 2016 at 3:31pm PST

We met each other when I moved to a new city and came to her school in 10th grade. We clicked instantly and we both thought we would be best friends forever. Once at a sleepover things got really intense and we hooked up. We both discovered we were lesbians that night and decided to keep it a secret from everybody else and have a secret relationship, because her parents are strict Catholics. It was awesome because we had sleepovers all the time and our parents knew nothing. This relationship went on for almost a year. Then one night at her house, her brother walked in and saw us kissing. Before we could say anything, he ran downstairs and told his parents. They told me to leave and I didn't know that that would be the last time I saw her in a long time. Her parents sent her to a Christian camp to "fix" her, but I know when she gets back our love will live on. I miss her more than I can put into words. Em, if you see this, I love and miss you so much.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Feb 28, 2016 at 8:07pm PST

I was in the 8th grade when we first met. My brother was a senior in high school and he was good friends with this kid who was a freshman, he insisted on having us meet each other, and when we did we just clicked. We began dating right after I graduated the 8th grade for three years, everything was great and we were best friends. The time came for him to go to college and he ended up choosing a college 24 hours away, there was no way we could possibly make it work because his family moved away too. Saying goodbye to him was one of the hardest things we had to do but we knew it was for the best, we still sometimes talk to see how each other are doing, but that's about it. It's been almost a year and sadly I am not quit over him yet. Although we could not work out, he will always be one of my best friends, and I hope he finds someone great, he really does deserve it

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 6, 2016 at 5:16pm PST

I fell madly in love with this boy last year. I met him through my best friend when we were going to Coachella. When I saw him I was shocked because he was so handsome. After talking to him I released he had a great personality and he was really funny. I instantly fell in love. We started talking and we came forward with our feelings and started dating. He gave me gifts, forehead kisses, cuddles and everything a girl wants in a relationship. He was perfect. Everything went great and we barely had fights. We even celebrated our 1 year anniversary. My sister had recently married this man and they got married in Paris and I was not able to come. When they got home I was gonna congratulate them, so I went to their house, but they did not answer so I walked in. I walked into the bedroom and caught my boyfriend and my sisters husband. They knew each other from middle school and found out they had feelings. My boyfriend had cheated on me with another man! I instantly broke up with him and cried for weeks. We have not talked since and I now hate him!!!!

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 6, 2016 at 10:53am PST

We dated for two years. He was my first love. I was his first everything. We started dating during high school/ sophomore year (graduated now) and I was curious to know how long he wanted to be together. He said definitely never letting go in other words forever… We go on our first trip after being 2 years together. I've never been so in love… Turns out he breaks up with me on the plane back to NY and figured out he doesn't want a "marriage like relationship." Unfortunately I had to move on. Also every time I would try to move on he would fight every guy I would try to be with. I would ask do you still love me and he would nod his head no sorry. We haven't spoke after a fist fight with a guy I was with over the summer and claiming it wasn't for me. He said he was done. It's been a year and a half and I still miss what we had. "Enjoy being single while I'm young" doesn't mean shit when you're so attached but now so alone because you won't let anyone love you. Fear of getting hurt again? HA, no thanks. Feelings suck and trying to forget about you is impossible.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 8, 2016 at 7:02pm PST

"We were together for 4 and half months but it felt like an eternity. I gave her everything a girl could ever ask for, she was my love, she was my world. We were secret for the beginning part of our relationship and then we finally became public but then it was cut short because she decided she didn't love me anymore. I felt like my whole world has just come crashing down on me and there was nothing I can do but just watch. I treated her like a queen and I spent any chance I could with her. I even took time out of my own busy schedule so I could go comfort her in her time of need. I just wish she was back in my arms and she loved me like I love her. I'll always love her, and I'll never stop because I do believe there is true love and I believe it is with her. I just hope I can find my way back and we can be together again. I love her and miss her so much and my heart feels like it's gunna burst because for once I actually was happy and I felt like I mattered and I wasn't invisible.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 16, 2016 at 4:06pm PDT

we met the first day of seventh grade in computer class. I was sitting completely by myself in front of a computer and there were tons of open seats all around but he walked up to me and pointed to the seat next to me and said "is this seat taken?" From that moment on we were inseparable. We spent every afternoon at each other's houses watching Shrek or reading manga. On the last day of seventh grade he confessed that he had a crush on me, and we started dating. We were together and happy for almost 5 years until halfway through senior year. The worst day of my life was the day I caught him. I came to his house to surprise him with candy and a dvd of Shrek The Third and when I went into his room I saw him hooking up with MY YOUNGER SISTER. I was heartbroken and ended things right then and there. I don't even know how long he was cheating on me. But even though he cheated, I still miss my best friend and the person I spent five years of my life with.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 14, 2016 at 8:48pm PDT

I became diagnosed with depression and anxiety before we got together. I explained to him that I had it. Through out the relationship I would try to explain to him how I felt at times. It was as if he didn't care or want to listen. He got mad at me for getting upset over things I could not control. I tried to make it up to him. I gave him my world. I never thought about texting another guy. But he cheated on me, and I took him back. He saw he had me wrapped around his finger. So he took advantage of me. And took everything that I did for him, for granted. We broke up because MY depression became too much for HIM to handle. I want this message to get out to any girl going through depression and is in a relationship. If he does not comfort you when you need it, LEAVE. If he does not stop the things that are upsetting you, LEAVE. It only gets worse. You're vulnerable already. If he's not mature enough he WILL take advantage of that. You're beautiful and strong enough to get through it, Without someone who clearly doesn't want to help. Take it from me, please.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 7, 2016 at 2:22pm PST

Mine probably isn't as sad as the others but, Idk, I just felt like sharing. Yesterday, he broke up with me. I have very, very bad anxiety. And his life hasn't been an easy one. We still, both love each other very much, that wasn't ever a problem. Well, come to find out he wasn't happy anymore in this relationship and felt like our relationship that we had was one of the things in his life that caused his large amounts of stress. So he broke up with me. It's ironic cause while I was reliving my stress and problems by being on this relationship, all it was doing was putting it on him. By ending us, He said it would help make him happy again if he wasn't so worried about our relationship all the time. So I'm trying to be happy, and let him do his thing if it means him being happy again. But it hurts so bad. I just got back from giving back his stuff and the bear he got me, and as soon as he shut his door I started sobbing. I'd be his again in a heart beat if he asked me to.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 10, 2016 at 4:37pm PST

We loved each other. I loved her as much as someone could love another human being. It was glorious. Im a senior and she's a sophomore and because I'm leaving to college at the tail end of this year, i was apprehensive about our long distance relationship and decided to break up with her to save me the trouble of heartbreak at college. She did not want this to happen and after a couple days i thought over it and knew was right. I was in love with her and it was the moments that mattered most, and not the future. But it was too late. My ex told me there was another guy, someone who treated her like the princess she was, who made her smile more than I ever could. I cried. I cried so much that it got to a point where no tears came out, only choked sobs. She broke up with me a little while later after dropping that bomb on me. I care for her so much and her happiness is my number one priority, so letting her go into the arms of the new man was the right decision, so that she could be happy. I hope one day we come back together because i am still crazy about her. I think about her every night and every day, hoping earnestly that one day we will find each others hearts again and rekindle the love that burned so bright during the year we spent together as a couple.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 8, 2016 at 6:32pm PST

Ok me and this girl were absolute best friends for about 8 months. Every single weekend she spent my house. Well we both started partying and I got out of control. I think that's when the problems started. She went to a party New Years and hid it from me (or at tried). I was sober for 23 days and then at a small get together met my boyfriend. That's when she was the one who got out of control with partying.. We didn't see each other for about 2 months and last weekend we finally had a "us" night. We ended up splitting up and she went to a party while I went to a smaller one at my boyfriends. I met up with later and turns out she lied about a lot of stuff to my boyfriends best friend and almost broke us up. So now we aren't best friends and honestly I don't know if it is fixable.. A best friend break up is so much worse than a relationship break up.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 16, 2016 at 7:05pm PDT

It was my freshman year of college and I wasn't really looking for anything serious. One day I was walking to my friends dorm and I saw him. I asked my friend who he was and he said that's my roommate Sean. Coincidence? Eventually we started going out. He was everything I could picture in a guy. He was the captain of the soccer team, he was smart, he had a great personality, he always made me smile, and of course he was nice to look at. The downfall was that every girl had a huge crush on him and he knew it but I tried to ignore that aspect. It didn't take me long to fall in love with him and that was extremely rare for me. Girls tried to break us apart because they wanted him and didn't like me and it was the same for me but, we were fine. Months passed and he changed. He started acting emotionless and I never could tell how he was feeling. He decided to end things with me after 6 months. To this day, I'm not sure if he ended things because he was going to a different college or what. To this day I would do anything to have him just hold me in his arms one more time and kiss me once more. He was my first love my and first heartbreak. I still love him and always will. Sean will forever hold a spot in my heart. I just wish things didn't have to end but not everything in life has a happy ending

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 5, 2016 at 12:11pm PST

We were together for a mere year and a half almost. We had it great for a while, we hung out a lot, and his parents and family really liked me. I could go over there when my family was irritating me. When we broke up the first time, last summer, I thought I lied to him about going to church and a baseball game. So when he went to Florida and had a little crush on a girl and came back. I was mad, he was mad, we were finished. We got back together from his brother and his girlfriend. It was a big rough patch for a little bit, then we clicked and became stronger and happier together. He was my first kiss, my first love, my first everything. It was even more amazing the second time around. We broke up recently after a big fight over his brother's girlfriend. I was trying to tell him that I was upset that she hung out with them a lot. He kept saying I was jealous and that I shouldn't be. And I was, but because I wanted to spend as much time with them as she did. He made me mad, so I started blurting out crap I never meant. I started talking trash about her and him to him for three days straight. After the fourth day, he told me he didn't want to be with me anymore because I started drama all the time and that I relied on him to much for stuff I could've did myself. I recently realized I what I did and I regret it so much. I should've minded my own business and just kept my mouth shut. I want him to come back so badly. I'd give anything to get back what we had. It makes me want to cry when I see him in the hallways now. If he is reading this now, I've been such a mean person and I admit I have. I promise to become a better person for you, me and more importantly, the Lord. I'm sorry for everything.

A photo posted by going private soon (@howwebroke) on Mar 5, 2016 at 10:04am PST

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